Jessica Uys · Enneagram Facilitator · Leadership Coach

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When is Now a Good Time?

 

We live in a world of “one day”…
 

One day I’ll get there. I’ll be that person, I’ll start that business, I’ll take up that challenge.
 
I’ll do it, I promise.
 

It’s just that now isn’t a good time.
 

And so our minds are occupied with amazing and inspiring dreams of the lives we yearn to live:
 
Wild locations to be explored.
 
Ideas to be birthed.
 
Challenges to be embraced.
 
We satisfy our cravings with post-it notes and pinterest and yet nothing really changes.
 

Because now is not the right time. 
 

“I’m not sure I’m ready to change jobs…just yet.”
 
“I’m not sure I’m ready to have a baby…right now.”
 
“I just need to… before I can…”
 
“I’d really like to…but I probably need to…first.”
 
Sound familiar?
 
We all do it.
 

We justify the putting off of our dreams because we think we’re not ready. 
 

Almost ready. But not quite.
 
So we defer and we avoid and we come up with a whole lot of reasons why now is not a good time:
 
A lengthy list of tasks that need to be completed first.
 
More time to “think about it”.
 
One more pilot to make sure it’s just perfect.
 
Another qualification or book or self-improvement course…just to make sure we’re really ready. 
 

But let’s admit what’s really going on here:
 

We’re avoiding change.
 
We’re allowing fear to get the better of us.
 
We’re sabotaging our own dreams.
 
We’re trying to hang on to a sense of control.
 
We’re trying to stay in the safe zone.
 
Here’s the thing:
 

I don’t think any of us will ever feel 100% ready for any kind of massive change.
 

Ever.
 
I honestly don’t think anybody ever wakes up and thinks: “YES! Today I am somature and incredibly responsible and more than ready to have my entire foundation shaken to the core”.
 
There is not a single soul on this planet that has graduated past self-doubt to the extent that they can confidently know with certainty that this timing is just perfect and it could never be any other way.
 
We’re all winging it. We’re all looking at our dreams and desires and doing what we can to make them happen.
 
And yet we’re all also at the mercy of other factors which aren’t always in our control.
 
The dream job arrives…but it’s a couple of months earlier than planned.
 
The pregnancy test is positive…but it’s a little earlier than expected.
 
The project lead lands on your doorstep…but it’s a little sooner than you’d prepared for.
 

This is the nature of things. This is how life unfolds. 
 

Maybe we just need to know this and accept this and work with this.
 
Maybe we need to realise that once we put the balls in motion, once we express our desire to the universe, timing doesn’t really factor into it. 
 
We don’t get to say: “This is what I want…but it has to be June 12th”.  
 

That’s just our desire for control. 
 

That’s just our fear wanting some stability and order in a situation that makes us feel unsafe. Because change, by its nature, is uncertain. 

It's also unpredictable.
 

So what do we do with this?
 

We put out our order to the universe (we provide clarity around our desires).
 
We take action to make it happen (we don’t just sit around and wait).
 
And then we hand over the details (we surrender the timings).
 

We have to allow ourselves to be open to trusting.   
 

We have to differentiate between when we choose and when we allow.
 
Between where we show action and where we practice patience.
 
Between showing up. And then letting go.
 
If we can get our heads around the fact that we will never feel like now is the perfect time, we can relax into the areas of our life where we can make a difference, and where we do have influence.
 

And trust that maybe the universe has a better handle on the details than we do.